The Importance of the Woman in the Home
97In another article I had written on the importance of the man in the home. Men are very important to their family. Unfortunately, the man has dropped out of the home in our society. Equally important, though, is the woman in the home. Women hold a key position in the shaping of the next generation, and in the life of their husband. Just as men have disappeared from the landscape of the home, women have disappeared as well. While the industrial revolution, and other factors, contributed to the man becoming uninvolved in the family, there are factors that have contributed to the woman becoming second rate in the family. We will look at why women have become seemingly unimportant to the family, why women are so valuable to the success of the family, and how to help women get back to fulfilling their important role in the life of their husbands and children.
Why women have disappeared from the home
It has been common knowledge for some time that men are absent from the home. However, women are becoming absent from the home at an alarming rate. The good news is, however, that there is a trend toward women becoming intimately involved in the life of the family once again. But why did women check out of their role in the home?
1. Cost of Living
The high cost of living in modern society has put the family in the position where both adults must work full time jobs to survive. While many people do this purely to obtain a lot of possessions, many do so out of necessity. There is absolutely nothing wrong with women working a job outside of the home. In the Bible, the book of Proverbs mentions the woman of virtue working outside of her home. In the last chapter of Proverbs, she is pictured as working long hours to help her family with making money. The problem occurs when, after coming home from work, both parents do not put in an equal amount of energy into the home. Often, the woman is left with all the responsibilities with the children and household chores.
2. Need to be equal with the man
With the drive of many women to strive to be equal with men, many women have chosen to work to prove themselves. While this is a worthy goal, it can be accomplished in more meaningful ways. With this desire to work like men do, women have sacrificed the family in their pursuit. Do not take this as an attack upon women, because men in their pursuit of wealth have equally sacrificed their family to gain wealth.
3. Selfishness
While this does not describe most women, there are a few women who have disappeared from the home due to selfishness. They want what they want. They want to party instead of living a responsible life. They do not wish to be tied down to their family. This leaves the children without a mother, and the husband without a wife.
4. Lack of recognition
This is a vague title for this point. What I mean is that while women play an important role in the life of the family, many are not recognized for their efforts. Some have become so oppressed by their husbands that they give up. They do not see a reason to keep trying, because what they do is never enough.
The value of women to the family
Women play such an important part in the life of the family. Their value is beyond measure. No amount of money can adequately compensate a woman for her work. Words cannot express what women mean to the success of their husband and children. But women are valuable. They are not second rate. They are not inferior. They are not weak. Giving birth to children, putting up with the daily pressures of life, dealing with the demands of children, maintaining a good relationship with her husband, and often working a full time job on top of all that would drive many men to their grave. Women are truly strong in their ability to handle it all.
Why are women so valuable to their family?
1. They provide security
There is something calming to a child to know that mom is there. Men fall apart when their wife is not happy with them. Women give such a sense of calm and security to the home like no one else can.
2. They bring their gift to the family
By this I mean that women are made different than men. That is a good thing. Women have a special gifting that they bring to the home to balance everything out. Without the woman, a huge piece of the puzzle that we call the family is missing. They bring a different perspective on things. They balance out the man in their approach to raising children. Without my wife's input on many issues that have come up over the years, I would be a pathetically sad case. She causes me to see the big picture, and to understand what I cannot understand on my own.
3. They love without limit
Women have such a way of loving their husband and children without conditions. You don't have to prove yourself. You are loved just because. My wife has taught me, though I haven't arrived yet, how to love fully no matter what. She has such an amazing capacity to put up with a lot from me and from the children, yet we know that we are loved. Men tend to be performance oriented. They want results. For the woman, just being there is enough.
4. They bring joy to the home
Women have their bad days. But for the most part they bring joy to the family. They are excited when the kids do well in school. They bring laughter. I have discovered that when my wife isn't bringing joy to our home that it is usually because of something I did to ruin it. If you are a man reading this and think that your wife isn't bringing joy to your home, you may want to find out if you have wounded her in such a way that you sucked the life out of her. If so, then do what is necessary to heal that wound. The joy will return.
Women returning to their role
The role of women in the home is not to make sure the house is always clean, though they can help with that. It is not to bow to the wishes of the man whenever he makes a demand. The role of the woman is to be a teammate with her husband in creating a home, and raising great children to function well in society.
How can women get back to their important role in the home?
1. Recognize where they are
Before women can get back to their place in the family, they must recognize that they have stepped back from that role. If you are a woman reading this, you may ask yourself whether or not you have steeped back from or abandoned all together your place in your family.
2. Get involved
Rather than coming up with some strategy on how to fulfill your place in the home, just begin again by being involved. You know what to do. You have the instinct for it. So, go for it. Love your spouse and children. You will make mistakes, but so will they.
3. Seek help
If you are struggling to get back to your position as the woman of the house, then seek out the help of other women who are doing a great job in their home. Take their advice. Watch them. Understand that they did not get to where they are automatically. They had to work hard at it. They had to make a lot of mistakes. But they kept at it, and never gave up.
4. Be content with your role
The valuable role that women play in the home is beyond words. Don't take it lightly. Don't think that you are less important. Avoid thinking that you are less valuable to society if you don't work outside of the home. Our culture has presented us with a false notion that women who are not successful in the corporate world are inferior. Women who put their whole self into their spouse and children are the ones who are changing the world. The saying is true that 'the hand the rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.'
This article is short and simple. I did not want to go deep with this. My mother and my wife have had such a profound impact on my life. If you are a man reading this, take note of your wife and praise her for her part she plays in your home. As the passage from Proverbs mentions, her value is beyond rubies (Proverbs 31:10). If you are a woman reading this I encourage you to take the steps necessary to either get back to your part in the home or to continue to hang in there and play that important role to your family. Without the woman in the home, the family would be left incomplete.
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Going to work outside the home is definitely a decision that you and your husband must agree on. However, it is not essential that you work outside the home, just because the children are gone. You have a great opportunity to help others, and to continue to fulfill all the responsibilities of maintaining a household. It looks like you have a lot of hobbies, and other meaningful pursuits. If you went to work a regular job, you would more than likely have to give up those pursuits.
There is nothing wrong with a woman working outside the home. In the pioneer days, the whole family worked, but they did it together. A main problem with the way our society is set up with everyone going away from the home to work is that it causes the family to become fragmented.
Best wishes to you as you enjoy the grandchildren.
Thank you.
Yess I hae seen the fragmentation in families when both paren't work outside the home. Fynny how I was preparing myself to be a stay at home person when I was in HighSchool! I took all the Home making classes that they offerent--Home Ec, Sewing, Cooking and the like. We even had a babysitters co-op in the school!
I feel the best place for one parent is to be in the home because statistics will tell you that with one parent in the home there is less chance of Alcohol and drug use/abuse.
Before we moved here I had a home base business--sewing. It was a good business to be n where I was at. When we moved here we took on some renovations and I had to stay hme while they worked on my house--well it extended itself into 6 years now and when the contractor did our basement, which was supposed to be my sewing business he shorted us by 3 feet. Things just happened tha working outside the home was nearly impossible for me. We both kind of came to the same conclusions on this. We are still doing renovations. You got to read my hub about Hiring a contractor to know what kind of horrible things we have been through. I am also doing yard work and all kinds of things that simply will not get done if I worked outside the home. This might sound funny--but I know my place is in the home.
What great comments. I was recently laid off from my job. And just let me say that I am happy to be home with my 2 yr old daughter. I did not have the courage to quit; though on many occasions I wanted to. I would leave her at the babysitters and cry on my way to the job. Well I agree with everything written here. I am proud to now be a stay at home mom; I believing for a solid writing career. I am also interested in sewing. I think that woman(more specifically mothers) should be in the home. I hope that more mothers come to understand that their children need them much more than any(being that it is an election year) political parties, corporations, etc.)
Thanks again for such a worthy article..
AKB
Ms. Ann- Thanks for the positive comment. My mom worked outside the home, and often worked overtime. I was home alone most of my growing up, and was raised by MTV, and got into a lot of trouble. My mother has told me often that she regrets not staying home with me.
I have been needing some encouragement in what I do. I know the Lord wants me to be the keeper of my home and a joyful mother to my son as well as a Godly wife. Sometimes I compare myself to other working women and wish I could trade places with them. Since I decided to stay at home with my son there are times that I miss getting out and going to work. I need to remember, though that my commitment to my husband, son and home are God's special calling on my life. What a priviledge! My "Boss" is the Creator of the universe!
Hannah- My wife stays home, homeschools our daughter and attends to our son. She has times of feelings inadequate or limited in some way. She does look at her part in life as a calling and her part in God's kingdom. One suggestion would be to look at your neighborhood and find ways of making it better with the help of your family. There are some ladies in my area who lived in a high crime neighborhood, so they got involved with the court system to find more beneficial ways of dealing with it to help people get out of crime. Too, they headed up projects to clean up the neighborhood. What a difference they have made. You are not stuck or useless. Look around you and you will find much that needs done on a volunteer basis.
Please don't envy working women. My mom worked full time and more and she and I regret it. I got into so much trouble because I raised myself, and she regrets missing out on my growing up years. You are blessed!
Thank you so much for your hub. It is great to see a man affirming and appreciating what a woman does for the family. I have recently been looking at my role as a wife and mum and am so glad that I found this in my research. Thanks again
kmb- I'm glad this encourages and helps you. May you be blessed as you fill such an important role.
there is nothing wrong in that,everything based on understanding betw the husband and wife.
a hartiest thanks to u all to praise a woman. truely i am very happy to read this............
garvita- glad you love it. Thanks for the input.
I do agree that a woman's place is in the home. I am not a mother yet I do work more then a lot and my home life suffers from it. I put myself through school and with two-seven jobs at a time I paid back my debt within three years. I have a great job now I take care of people and I do love it but there is some much in the house that needs to be completed with in a day. I love my partner he is an amazing man he's smart, funny and well he's great. We've been together for the past seven years and I want to start a family in seven more years from now, when I'm 32. It is so great to read something that I do agree with when it comes to women's role in society. I think that a women working should really be a choice it kind of is but other woman tend to look down on you when you tell them that you want to be a house wife and then a stay at home mom not just for the first six months of a child's life which is kind of acceptable in our society but the entire 18 years and beyond I know women wanted to go to work back in the day to "prove" themselves but it should have stayed a choice you will always need someone at home to take care of the house, cooking and all of the things that go along with the house instead of women going off in the morning coming home late at night eating falling asleep getting up and going back to work then the cooking house work and everything in between get kind of half way done on the one day that you have off and your house and family suffers from it Woman are nurturing spiritual beings we are here to be here for our families and partners our entire society will benefit when our younger generation benefits and everything starts in the home where we learn our first word, to walk, what to eat, how to dress, right from wrong and to have the right influences we have to have some on there to teach them to us our generation and our younger generations are gong to suffer from the woman not making the home the main focus. My mom worked through out my childhood before that she was in school my mom was spent by the time she got home and usually to stressed out to deal with the four of us my older brother my older sister my twin brother and me we learned from a very young age how to do a lot of things on our own my dad wanted my mom to be a stay at home wife and mother my mom chose to work because she had something to "prove" to herself and the world she even decided to move out of my dad's house (he paid for the house and he let my mom go to school and do as she wished but he would not pay for her schooling for her she is still in student loan debt today)My dad died when I was 12 and my mom had already missed so much she continued to miss everything and things that she could have made it to she chose not to come she was to tired from work I wish that she was more apart of my life and stayed at home with us longer then the five months that she did I know that I have nothing to "prove" to anyone and being a house wife is really hard work in it's self I can not wait to be one my family and my partner will be so much better off and I will never be ashamed to be a stay at home mom when I have children I want to be present in my home and when I have them in my children's lives I think work should be a choice and the best work you can do is in the home it is where everything starts
Mindy- well said !!!!!!!
It seems as you all are treating the Bible literally. According to you women's place is at home with kids and she is the one to cook and serve her husband. She is the husband's possession and has to obey his will. What about the woman herself? Is there no place for her self-realization, because cooking and giving birth to children does not lead to any kind of self-realization. Such women are usually not educated (i cannot imagine an educated woman to submit and humiliate herself like this!) and after a while they become frustrated as they are not fulfilling themselves, they are stuck in the kitchen and they dont have any purpose in life. I suggest that men stay at home, play with kids, help them with homework and cook for them, it is the most frequent case that kids are lacking contact with their fathers. My mom raised me all by herself and she was very courageous, she didn't spend much time with but this taught me to be self-sufficient, strong and independent. And what you want is a world of stupid women following the orders of their authoritative husbands, being dependent on them and having no say in life. Fortunately, the world tends to employ progressive ideas and women will not return to the home!
Rachel- Im sorry to find you so defensive and so wrong. This article is not about the woman in the kitchen, but about the woman in the home. You need to get off the self-sufficiency kick and realize that a great family is made up of people who depend on each other. People who are self-sufficient, including men make for terrible partners, because they fail to see the value of others. They only think of themselves. No matter what you say, the modern woman has been ripped off because she has lost her value. Women who play a major role in their home are rewarded with loving husbands and admiring children. Self- sufficient woman find themselves divorced with broken kids. Please don't believe the modern lie about the role of the woman. Yes, women should be in the kitchen working right along side their husband. The husband and wife should be sharing the responsibilities of the home.
This site is a great blessing to me.I am an engineer by profession got a managerial position for many years during my singlehood.Now im married i gave up my profession got two kids but sometimes im freaking whenever my husband has dominating ego,Im rebelling to go find my pride and dignity just not to be dominated by orders as i'm not used to.Though whenever I move to find a career again I look back to my kids and husband that I love them so much and made me think this is why the reason I'm living today,that thought would slow me down and tame my temper.My mother would told me always to submit to my husband as what God's command.I love my mother though she has no profession in outside world,her presence is so valuable,she is radiating balance and harmony.Like any other women our fears of submitting to our husband is being un-arm when they do follishness.The thought of having no market value and no money whenever they will be fooled my other woman is a great threat to us wife specially when the husband is working overseas.
I am still in the process of pulling two rods to which to go to.
cristina wee- This article is about the importance of a woman in the home, not about women should stay in the home and not work. The Bible shows examples of women working outside the home. However, they always made the home the most important priority. Today, women and men let work take over the home. However, I respect your decision. It is scary to think what could happen if you have no market value. I think your past work will help if anything bad did happen. By the way, the Bible teaches about husbands submitting to their wife as well. Both are to submit to each other.
Before having kids there is no prblem when woman works outside of home ,but after having kids it's better to stay at home to take care house ,husband , children ,preparing food ............what a lot of works the house needs.
in what year was this article written?
gifty- I'm assuming your being sarcastic, and that you refuse to see the value of women
how of educated womans staying in home is happy throght the life. Atleast once in a month you may think that you r waste, you r alone in home.Going out for job used to update knowledge and it is also used to bring the next generation talented.How many of enquire whether the childrens with mother in home and childrens without mother in home is talented,happy and weak.why the husbands cant able to share the homework.Its not a company its just home,nowadays so many machines are there to help them.eventhough the womens are staying in home is really lazy and husbands those not allowing is a selfish and a dominated.
subarishi- I will say this again. This article is not about women staying at home. It is about the importance of the woman's role in the family. Women who choose to stay at home are not lazy, because many of them homeschool and have many other responsibilities. Many also have home based businesses.
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Lady Guinevere Level 6 Commenter 3 years ago
Very good hub! I am in the home, children have left and about to be a Grandmother!! Wooo Hoo--been waiting along time! At any rate it is hard to be in the home when everyone thinks that your place is in a career when the kids leave. I have been accused of "using my husband's money" and I should go to work to help pay for my own health insurance. I know that God will provide if anything should happen to my husband. I cannot live in fear that some day he will die and I am left with nothing. To me that is no way to live. I feel that I am there if the children need me and have on occasion been glad that I was here when they call on me. I am still very much more useful in th home then at some job. My husband works three jobs--one is with the same company but one day more a week. He LOVES what he does. He got a substantial raise and was told that he could quite the other two jobs--but it was his choice not to quit any of them. He loves it. He is also involved in a men's organization and travels alot. We only have one car. Can I just say--I love being in the home and supporting him. There is alot of peer pressure to go to work and some women just give in because that's all they hear.
What do you think about a woman going out there in the work world when the kids leave home?
Come check my hub out on It is Time and other hubs.